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Producer, DJ, vinyl nut
Jungle, hardcore, UK garage, happy hardcore

Crap Metal Album Covers #1: Tokyo Blade – Blackhearts & Jaded Spades

The music world is full of crap artwork but there’s certainly one genre that really seems to excel in it and that’s heavy metal. I love metal and to make up for the fact that I’ll rarely post up any tunes here for people to check out then I thought it might be fun to have a look at some of the more interesting metal artwork I’ve come across in the past.

On to our first…


Now, I have no idea what the concept behind this even was. For starters there’s not much metal about it at all. It actually reminds me more of the cartoons from One Crazy Summer a film that I, for some unknown reason, have seen more than once and you’re lucky to have never heard of (I hope). It did have the guy from Police Academy with the funny voice in it, which perhaps makes it almost worth watching.

Anyway, I digress. This cover is truly awful. Wikipedia tells me “[the album] was interpreted as an attempt to conquer the American and Japanese markets, where glam and pop metal acts dominated the charts, but to no avail.”

To no avail… I wonder why. Would you buy that?